Bitter Taste
Wednesday night, some friends and I planned to have dinner at a restaurant called Silvertone's. I arrived early. The night was warm and the streets were still wet from the rain a few hours before. It was one of those nights where it would be pleasant just to walk around and observe, take some pictures and soak in the atmosphere.
After taking this shot of the window, I went in to look for my friends, but didn't see them. The place seemed to be more of a bar than a restaurant, really loud and crowded. I went back outside and waited for my friends there. When they arrived, I found out that they were not allowed to make reservations and it was going to be a forty-five minute wait.
We decided not to wait and ended up going to the Elephant & Castle Pub & Restaurant. The food was pretty good overall, but the service was... I don't even want to say. Let me describe the experience and you choose the adjectives.
There were five of us, so we knew it could be a wait. We were pleasantly surprised when were seated immediately. My friends and I have decided to try to get together for a nice meal out once a month. This time we were also doing our Christmas gift exchange, so we had a bunch of packages. We sat in our chairs, were getting settled and comfortable when the waitress came over to us and asked us why we were sitting there. No nice greeting, but asked us why we were there. As if we didn't belong. I hate to think that color is an issue here, but we are all black. We also all happen to be attorneys.
So we are all immediately not feeling so happy. One of my friends replied that we had been seated there. The waitress proceeded to say that our being seated there was a mistake. We couldn't sit there. The table was reserved and we would have to move. No smile. Just an accusing look and tone. Now I would have expected her at least to apologize for the mistake, say she was really sorry, that she would find us another table and maybe give us complimentary drinks for our trouble. We were seated right in the middle of the restaurant and we had to gather up all our things and move to another table. It was rather embarassing. Through the entire evening, she never apologizes for this. Why would an establishment want to treat its customers like that?
We get to our much smaller table and wait, wait, and wait for our waitress to come back. I could go through every detail of this meal, but this post is getting too long; it's late and I'm getting annoyed thinking about it again. Quick summary, she didn't bring us napkins or utensils. We had to ask another waiter. She kept disappearing. It certainly put a damper on our gift exchange and left a bitter taste in my mouth.
The experience was the opposite of one that I am reminded of at Le Petit Robert Bistro. It was a different group of friends and I was the only black one. I hate to think it mattered, but you never know. Anyway, it was a birthday celebration and we had reservations. We ended up having to wait for close to an hour, but the staff was really friendly and joking around with us, so it wasn't so bad. And since we seemed to have a nice rapport, I nicely asked if we could have a complimentary bottle of wine for our trouble. They happily obliged. My friends were embarassed that I asked, but I expect good service along with good food.
And for the rest of the evening the food was outstanding and the service was top-notch. I felt that they more than made up for the wait and I suggested at the end that we still give a 20% tip. I had to make my case for the tip to my friends, but we all agreed in the end.
Now for the most recent evening, the service was so bad, even I who just about always gives a 20% tip agreed that it should be minimal at best. We also wrote a note on our receipt explaining why the tip was so low. All of us discussed the "double-edged sword" that we were dealing with. The service was bad, so we wanted to leave a small tip, but we know the stereotype about black people being bad tippers. We were not trying to perpetuate it, but felt we had no choice. Anyway, that was my Wednesday night.
Comments
Like you, I am generally a 20% tipper, but I won't be nearly so generous to rude or indifferent treatment.
About treating black people differently,it happens a lot in the south.Specially in the small towns than cities!That's life unfortunately.
Happy Holidays Anali.Enjoy with your family.
A tip is
"to give somebody a gift of money in return for a service, especially in addition to what is owed"
so as attorney you need not be told about your right to refuse.
I don't want comment on the black issue, because it pains me to talk about it over and over.
Merry christmas !
www.cforcooking.com
so when you get bad service you withold all or a portion of the tip, completely understood.
but you ask for free stuff as well? I think the tip is kind of there as a retainer, its your leverage to assure proper service, isn't that enough? Talk about a double edged sword!
Sounds like a disappointing time for sure. Perhaps it was because you're black, perhaps its because you decided to have a christmas party at a table in a pub with no reservation or anything when they rely on turning tables over a couple of times a night for their living. I would imagine in a modern city that would be more likely the stereotype of "cheap" than just being black.
Anyway. Sorry you had to put up with that kind of crap, especially on a night of celebration.
I would contact the manager and share your experience, since your note likely made its way to the trash.
asha - The free wine was at a different restaurant. Le Petit Robert Bistro was a great place. I highly recommend it! Happy Holidays to you too!
jac - It is a pain to talk about it over and over. It may not have been an issue, but I guess I'll never know. Merry Christmas to you too!
jeff - I didn't pick either of the restaurants Wednesday, but I think I'm picking next time.
kris - Welcome. You have a right to your opinion of us as cheap, but I have to disagree.
It wasn't a "Christmas party." We had dinner and gave each other one gift. A quick exchange. We would have been out of there sooner if our waitress had come back more often and not left us waiting.
When I suggested the free wine it was with a smile and friendly voice. And at this restaurant, there was a very friendly vibe. If they had said no, that would have been fine too. However it would have conveyed a different message to me about the importance they placed on us as customers. I would not have tried to convince my friends to give the 20% tip.
I'm sorry you were ignored too. Like I said, race may have had nothing to do with it. I just don't know. But being black, it's always a question in the back of my head and my friends had the same feeling.
The nice tone puts the management at ease and in your corner, instead of on the defensive.
Mentioning that you have friends who recommended the place will tell them that they not only stand to lose your business, but also that of your friends - and, by extension, their friends and the friends of those friends, etc.
Mentioning your race probably wouldn't hurt. However, that all depends upon whether or not you want to use it. You hope you weren't treated badly because of it, so I suppose you don't want to use it for leverage, either, right? However, nobody wants to even think about a civil rights violation coming down on their head.
I would mention that you and your friends are lawyers, but not use a firm letterhead. My opinion; Your call may be different.
Anyway, doing all or most of the above, I'd be very surprised if you didn't receive an effusive apology in return, as well as free dinner for all of you in future. And it certainly sounds like you deserve it.
I wanted to get out the word of my experience and put this place on notice that they will be called out for treating people badly. Thankfully adamg at Universal Hub helped me spread the word. Now when someone Googles this place, hopefully my post will come up.
Boston is a small town; people hear things. Instead of 6 degrees of separation, it's more like 1 or 2. If management wants to contact me to apologize, they can email me.
kat - Welcome! It seems to be the overriding theme that this place is just not up on their service.
a.r. - Thanks for stopping by! It's very interesting seeing the comments here. Nobody seems too impressed with E&C. I wonder why people keep going back. I'm surprised about Le Petit, but maybe it was an off night when you went.
Everyone should be treated well and I'm sure there have been more than a few times when customers who were judged one way, tipped in the totally opposite way.
Anali, it was your generosity that you even paid gratuity! Again she deserved to get fired.
imagined-community - Thank you for so much insight! Very interesting! I never knew that groups of women are considered to be bad tippers.
Hmmm. Burned out bitter waitress syndrome, that could be it. I agree that waiting tables is one of the hardest jobs. Having to deal with the public all the time can be excruciating. People can be so disrespectful, but it definitely goes both ways.
nance - Restaurants close a lot in Boston too. It's such a tough business. Everyone universally seems to want me to write the letter, but I don't know if I have it in me. We'll see.
I hope you also had a chance to talk with the management. There is just no excuse for that treatment.
I would also like to address the comments where the guest percieved that the service was based in discrimination. I would like to assure you that at the Elephant & Castle diversity is a key component of our culture both with our guests, as well as is reflected in our employee group. Here at our Pub, we employ people from all races and ethnic origins, including several African Americans.
I would like to invite the guest who placed the original post to contact me, so that I can extend my apologies and try to amend the situation.
Regards,
Mary Martin
617-350-9977
I never said that I knew positively that it was based on race, however we all had a general feeling that it was a possibility. If you knew me, you would so know that the "race card" is not my thing. I don't think it is "whining" when we had reservations for a set time and we had to wait for an hour.
If you had read this post and the comments that I made back in a more thorough manner, these things that I have just noted would have been quite apparent to you.